I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
