so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
