i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Randomize
