I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
