some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
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Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Got wasted in a little tiki hut by the beach yesterday. Woke up with a coconut and half of a mushroom burger in my purse. I also have a picture of our Romanian bartender's fingernails on my phone lol
Why do you always wake up with meat in your purse?
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
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