what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
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