Already got asked if we're dating
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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