Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
