Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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