That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
