I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize
