i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
