I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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