The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
Randomize
