Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
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