shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize