So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
Define "chronic" masturbator.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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