We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
