I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
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