Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
