the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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