I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
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