Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
my shit smells like andre
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize
