i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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