last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
