i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
the raccoons are back...
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