oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
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Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
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Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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