is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
