oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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