Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
he was CRYING into my vagina
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
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I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
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And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
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