You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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