About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
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