Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(575): View more from New Mexico

i permit you to call me

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(575): i permit you to call me http://tfl.nu/5lhr

Replies (4) Good night (1193) Bad night (691)
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(972): View more from Texas

Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.

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(972): Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition. http://tfl.nu/d2b2

Replies (20) Good night (2586) Bad night (826)
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(515): View more from Iowa

Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"

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(515): Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?" http://tfl.nu/shhr

Replies (28) Good night (6440) Bad night (1235)
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(402): View more from Nebraska

You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?

(1-402): View more from Nebraska

I like it rough

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(402): You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right? (1-402): I like it rough http://tfl.nu/uqsl

Replies (38) Good night (6944) Bad night (1769)
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(402): View more from Nebraska

Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.

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(402): Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall. http://tfl.nu/z0q7

Replies (9) Good night (4430) Bad night (941)
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(580): View more from Oklahoma

I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?

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(580): I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight? http://tfl.nu/jndw

Replies (1) Good night (2341) Bad night (716)
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(739): View more from

The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.

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(739): The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous. http://tfl.nu/v9ao

Replies (13) Good night (3469) Bad night (723)
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(217): View more from Illinois

it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him

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(217): it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him http://tfl.nu/i59z

Replies (11) Good night (1129) Bad night (1461)
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(613): View more from Ontario

She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think

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(613): She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think http://tfl.nu/7fbd

Replies (21) Good night (981) Bad night (2077)
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(609): View more from New Jersey

Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps

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(609): Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps http://tfl.nu/8xhn

Replies (5) Good night (2621) Bad night (643)
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(917): View more from New York City

That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.

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(917): That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies. http://tfl.nu/z8d5

Replies (7) Good night (961) Bad night (441)
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(701): View more from North Dakota

You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.

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(701): You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole. http://tfl.nu/p45w

Replies (6) Good night (805) Bad night (695)
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(516): View more from New York

Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god

(1-516): View more from New York

You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!

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(516): Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god (1-516): You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!! http://tfl.nu/q7xb

Replies (4) Good night (858) Bad night (381)
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(857): View more from Massachusetts

You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun

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(857): You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun http://tfl.nu/b2w1

Replies (0) Good night (480) Bad night (307)
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(937): View more from Ohio

So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?

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(937): So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here? http://tfl.nu/g6gi

Replies (7) Good night (493) Bad night (314)

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