So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
