I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
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