I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
We need to rekindle our bromance
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
Life is so much better after having sex.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
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