hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
