Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
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