I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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