Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize