Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
The cops high fived after they tackled you
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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