I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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