I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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