so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
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