I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize