I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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