I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
