Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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