I never want to see another naked old woman again.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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