No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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