I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
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